Moed Katan Chart #8
Chart for Moed Katan Daf 21b
WHEN MAY ONE COMFORT OR GREET AN AVEL,
AND WHEN MAY AN AVEL RETURN ONE'S GREETING?
MAY AN AVEL
MAY AN AVEL
MAY ONE GREET
|1||First 3 days (2)||Yes||No (3)||No (4)||No|
|2||3 - 7 days||Yes||Yes (5)||No (4)||No|
|3||7 - 30 days||Yes||Yes||Yes||No|
|4||30 days - 12 mos.||No (6)||Yes||Yes||Yes (7)|
(1) This refers only to initiating a verbal greeting. An Avel is permitted to nod his head as one does when he greets his friend (RITVA 27a).
(2) The first three days of Aveilus are the most stringent, since the decomposition of the body of the deceased has not yet begun, and thus it has not yet provided atonement for the soul (see Shabbos 151b).
(3) Instead of returning the greeting, the Avel should reply, "I am an Avel."
(4) The Avel is permitted, however, to initiate a greeting to a large group.
(5) For the sake of peace, the Avel is permitted to return a greeting of "Shalom" to one who initiated a greeting unaware that he is an Avel.
(6) One is permitted, however, to comfort him "indirectly" ("Min ha'Tzad"), which means to comfort the Avel without mentioning the name of the deceased. One is permitted to comfort an Avel whose parent died until twelve months have passed from the death.
(7) The allowance to greet an Avel with "Shalom" applies only when he is mourning for a relative who is not his parent. One is prohibited to greet an Avel whose parent died until twelve months have passed.