12th CYCLE DEDICATION
SOTAH 26-28 - A week of study material has been dedicated by Mrs. Rita Grunberger of Queens, N.Y., in loving memory of her husband, Reb Yitzchok Yakov (Irving) ben Eliyahu Grunberger. Irving Grunberger helped many people quietly in an unassuming manner and is dearly missed by all who knew him. His Yahrzeit is 10 Sivan.

1)

WHICH BI'OS FORBID A WOMAN TO HER HUSBAND? [Arayos: Sotah]

(a)

Gemara

1.

26b - Question: Shmuel taught that one can warn against a Shachuf (a man who cannot have Kishuy (an erection). If so,) what do we learn from "semen"?

2.

Answer #1 (Rava): It excludes (warning her against) intimacy without Bi'ah.

3.

Objection (Abaye): That is mere licentiousness. The Torah does not forbid a woman to her husband for that!

4.

Answer #2 (Abaye): He warned her against touching (of his genitals to hers).

5.

Question: According to the opinion that this is Ha'ara'ah (the minimum that is considered Bi'ah), surely he can warn against this! What does "semen" exclude?

6.

Defense of Answer #1: Really, he warned her against intimacy without Bi'ah. One might have thought that warning depends on what disturbs the husband. If he is concerned for this, it is proper warning. The Beraisa teaches that this is not so.

7.

28a: Regarding Sotah, the Torah does not forbid for Shogeg like for Mezid.

(b)

Rishonim

1.

Rambam (Hilchos Sotah 1:1): One can warn against seclusion with a Shachuf, i.e. one who cannot have Kishuy or father children.

2.

Rambam (Hilchos Isurei Bi'ah 1:11): One who had Bi'ah without Kishuy, due to illness or he was born this way, does not get lashes, Kares, and surely not Misah.

3.

Rosh (Yevamos 6:4): The Halachah is, one is exempt for Bi'ah without Kishuy.

(c)

Poskim

1.

Shulchan Aruch (EH 178:2): One can warn against seclusion with a Shachuf.

2.

Rema (20:1): Witnesses need not see the Ever enter her. If they see them acting like adulterers, this suffices to kill them, and she is forbidden to her husband. If an adult woman had Bi'ah with a boy less than nine, she is not killed, and is permitted to her husband. The Tur taught about when she is killed (even though nowadays we do not kill), to teach about when she is forbidden to her husband.

i.

Beis Yosef (DH v'Ein): The Tur teaches the severity of these matters.

ii.

Nimukei Yosef (Yevamos 8a DH Gemara): We force a man to divorce his wife only through witnesses. It suffices to see them acting like adulterers. One is killed for Ha'ara'ah, and it forbids her to her husband.

iii.

Darchei Moshe (3): He teaches that when she is killed, she is forbidden.

iv.

Question #1 (against Rema - Shevus Yakov 1:94): One is not liable for Bi'ah without Kishuy, yet one may warn against seclusion with a Chashuf, for his Bi'ah forbids! The Nimukei Yosef said that what suffices to kill, also suffices to forbid to her husband. He did not say that only such Bi'ah forbids!

v.

Answer #1 (the Sha'ar Efrayim' son): Warning and seclusion depend on what bothers the husband. Bi'as Shachuf forbids only if she was warned about him. If not, she is not Chayav Misah, so she is not forbidden.

vi.

Rejection (and Answer #2 - Shevus Yakov): This was only the Hava Amina! R. Yisachar Berman ha'Levi answered that if one who can have normal Bi'ah, and had Bi'ah without Kishuy, there is no Misah and it does not forbid. For a Shachuf, this is Bi'ah, and it obligates Misah and forbids.

vii.

Rejection (Shevus Yakov): The Rambam (Isurei Bi'ah 1:11) says that there is no Misah for a Shachuf!

viii.

Answer #3 (Beis Shmuel 5): This is an exception to the rule that Bi'ah forbids only if it obligates Misah.

ix.

Answer #4 (Yad ha'Melech Sotah 1:1, cited by Pischei Teshuvah 178:3): One can warn about a Shachuf, even though seclusion or Bi'ah with him do not forbid her to her husband, only to Terumah. The curses apply; if she had Bi'ah with him and drinks, she will die.

x.

Note: Shmuel taught Stam that one can warn about him! A Sotah who drinks need not swear about Bi'os that don't forbid her (18b), e.g. before she did Yibum (according to Chachamim). Why does she drink for one whose Bi'ah doesn't forbid?! Perhaps here is worse, for she betrayed her husband.

xi.

Question #2 (Chelkas Mechokek 3): One opinion says that we force a man to divorce through witnesses of Ki'ur (circumstantial evidence of Bi'ah), even though we do not kill for this!

xii.

Answer (and Answer #5 to Question #1 - Chelkas Mechokek 3): The Rema says that anyone Chayav Misah is forbidden. Also others can be forbidden!

xiii.

Question #3 (Taz 2): He is Chayav Misah whenever he was Mezid, even though she is permitted if she was forced, like Bas Sheva!

xiv.

Note: Perhaps the Rema forbids her whenever she is Chayav Misah.

xv.

Question #4 (Panim Me'iros 3:22 DH Ach): Perhaps Shogeg exempts from death, but only Ones permits to her husband! The Rambam permits if she was threatened with a sword and transgressed. The Nimukei Yosef did not necessarily mean that Ha'ara'ah forbids only because one is killed for it. If he did, what is his source? However, the Gemara (28a) said that Shogeg is not like Mezid regarding Sotah. All the Acharonim agree with the Rema.

xvi.

Answer (Korban ha'Edah Sotah Sof 21a): "V'Hi Lo Nitpasah" permits a Yisrael's wife who was raped. The Yerushalmi asked about when she was Shogeg, and whether we forbid the Bo'el when he was Mezid. It learns from "Letam'ah Vah" that it depends on her: there is no Isur unless she was Mezid.

xvii.

Bach (DH ha'Ones): The Ri holds that if the Bo'el was forced, even though he should have been Moser Nefesh (forfeited his life) to avoid transgressing, he is not killed, therefore she is not forbidden. The Rambam disagrees.

xviii.

Chelkas Mechokek (3): She is permitted if she was forced, regardless of his intent! Perhaps he discusses a woman forced to transgress through an act. The Rambam holds that she is Chayav Misah for not being Moser Nefesh, so she is forbidden. The Ri exempts her from Misah, so she is permitted.

See also: