Yaakov took his eleven children across the ford of the River Yabok; but where was Dinah?
Rashi: He hid Dinah 1 in a box, so that Esav should not set his eyes on her. He was punished for withholding her from Esav, 2 for had Esav married her, she might have influenced him to do Teshuvah.
Kol Eliyahu: What is the source that he hid Dinah? Perhaps she was there, and one of the sons was missing! Refer to 32:23:1.01:4.
Rashi: As a result, she fell into the hands of Shechem, as the Torah records in Chapter 34.
Why does the Torah write "ba'Laylah Hu" and not 'ba'Laylah ha'Hu'?
Why did Yaakov cross the River Yabok in the middle of the night?
Rashbam: In order to escape from Esav. 1
Oznayim la'Torah: He did so in order to enter Eretz Yisrael, 2 so he would also have the merit of dwelling in Eretz Yisrael before the possible war with Esav, and Ma'avar Yabok is synonymous with the Yarden (Chizkuni). 3
Oznayim la'Torah: Even if Yaakov was already in Eretz Sichon or Og, this explanation is justified, seeing as the Kedushah of Eretz Yisrael proper (west of the Yarden) is greater than that of the east bank.
Oznayim la'Torah: And the Torah refers to it as Ma'avar Yabok due to the Avak (dust) that Yaakov and the angel raised as they struggled.
Above (Bereishis 31:17), Yaakov is praised for putting his sons ahead of his wives, unlike Esav (see Rashi loc. cit., and refer to 31:17:1.1). Here, why did Yaakov take his wives across the river before his sons? And why did Moshe put his wife on the donkey before his sons (Shemos 4:20)?
Moshav Zekenim (to Bereishis 36:6): Yaakov feared to take his children first, lest they be left alone. 1 Moshe's sons were very young and Tziporah needed to hold them (Gur Aryeh to 31:17 says this as well).
Oznayim la'Torah: Because to leave his wives together with his male slaves, would have constituted an Isur Yichud. 2
Ha'amek Davar: Yaakov brought across his wives together with his sons 3 - he had Hashem's promise to protect his sons, and via them, also his wives would be protected. However, there was no promise for Dinah. Bilhah and Zilpah are called Shefachos here, for they helped to transfer the children.
Gur Aryeh (to 31:17) #1: It was easier to help the [adult] women to cross the river than the young children, so he took care of the women first.
Gur Aryeh (to 31:17) #2: The focus on whom to put first is relevant when going to settle in a new place. Priorities shown at that time are significant; marrying and having children are the essence of settling the world. Crossing a river is not such a significant step.
Moshav Zekenim asks that we could say the same for Esav! (Also, in any case the children will be alone at some time! Here it was night. Perhaps the children were sleeping, and they were prone to wake up amidst being carried across the river. They can sleep without their mothers (there were servants to guard them), but it is important that their mothers be there if they will wake up. This does not apply to Esav, for surely he traveled during the day - PF.)
There is no Isur of many men with many women (EH 22:6)! Yaakov had four wives, and also female slaves! Also, 'Ba'alah b'Ir' should permit, for Yaakov is near and can return at any time! Perhaps Yaakov was extra stringent, or there was more concern due to Rachel's beauty. (PF)
Since his sons were primary, why does the Torah mention his wives before his sons? (PF)
What is Ma'avar Yabok?
Rashbam: It is a place where people normally cross the river Yabok. Radak - it is shallow there. Toras Moshe - there is a bridge there. 1 Also refer to 32:24:1:5*.
Chizkuni: Some say that it is the Yarden. Above (32:11), Yaakov said 'I crossed this [very same] Yarden.'
Malbim: It is a small river, caused by the [big] river overflowing its banks. First Yaakov crossed the small river, 2 then he took [his family] across the river itself, and then he took all his property across.
Toras Moshe: People take wood without the owner's consent to make bridges. The Heter to cross on them is based on Dina d'Malchusa Dina (the kingdom's law is binding). Yaakov did not want to rely on this, so he made himself like a bridge to take his property over, because Tzadikim do not use theft.
I.e. his entire camp were able to cross by themselves with him, for it was shallow. (PF)
QUESTIONS ON RASHI
Rashi writes: "'Achad Asar Yeladav' (his eleven children) - And where was Dinah... ?" How does Rashi know that Dinah was the one who was absent (and not one of the sons)?
Gur Aryeh #1: Rashi to 43:29 writes that all of the Shevatim were present when Yaakov ascribed them Chaninah (favor, grace) upon encountering Esav (33:5 - except Binyamin, who was not yet born). That means the only one who could have been missing was Dinah. 1
Gur Aryeh #2: "Yeladav" is in the masculine, (as opposed to Yaldah in the feminine, i.e. the boys were present, and Dinah was absent). 2
Gur Aryeh #3: The Pasuk enumerates how Yaakov ferried his family in order of importance - his wives, then maidservants, then "Yeladim." If Dinah had been present, she would have been listed separately at the end - 'and Dinah his daughter.' This last phrase is the one that is missing.
Kol Eliyahu: This cannot be, for the Gemara says that the Mikdash was built in Binyamin's portion because [only] he did not bow to Esav. 3
Gur Aryeh rejects this approach; perhaps one of the boys had went off somewhere, but returned in time to meet Esav.
We may ask that in Lashon ha'Kodesh, the masculine is used as the default tense for a group containing both males and females - if so, Dinah might have been among "Yeladav"? Perhaps Gur Aryeh holds that when a Pasuk uses the masculine tense, we should assume it refers to males, unless we are forced to say that females are included. Here it may well mean the 11 boys. (EK)
(I did not find such a Gemara, but Targum Sheni (Esther 3:3) and Hadar Zekenim and Riva to Devarim 33:12 say so. Also refer to 33:6:151:2*. - PF)
Rashi writes: "... This is why Yaakov was punished... and she fell to the hands of Shechem." How do we know that this was the cause?
Gur Aryeh: The Torah routinely tells the righteousness of a Tzadik. If it tells of some misfortune that befell a Tzadik, the Torah must tell us what sin caused this to happen (for the Torah is complete). 1 The Torah is telling us that hiding Dinah was the cause.
Compare to 31:32:1.2:1.
Rashi writes that the episode with Dinah came because Yaakov hid her from Esav. Later (35:1), he ascribes it to the fact that he delayed on the journey and did not hurry back to his parents!
Sifsei Chachamim: Both mistakes caused the incident with Shechem to take place ('Zeh v'Zeh Gorem').
Also refer to 35:1:151.
Rashi writes that Yaakov was punished for withholding Dinah from Esav. But her mother Leah was commended for not wanting to marry him (see Rashi to 29:17)!
Leah cannot be taken to task; she wept because a) She did not want to marry Esav ha'Rasha (refer to 29:17:1:1 and the note there) b) because she wanted to marry Yaakov, so her tears were justified. Yaakov had no justifiable reason for withholding Dinah from Esav. Perhaps if Dinah had wept or even merely declined due to Esav's wickedness, he too would not have been taken to task. 1
Moshav Zekenim: Esav accepted to repent. He said "Nis'ah v'Nelechah, v'Elchah l'Negdecha"(Bereishis 33:12) - I will be like you in terms of Judaism. 2
R. C. Fogel, citing R. Yechezkel Levenstein: Surely he should not marry her to a Rasha! The Midrash Rabah (80:4) says, "You did not request to marry her to the circumcised." Yaakov should have appreciated Esav's attributes - he was born to Yitzchak and Rivkah, he had a Bris [according to this Midrash] - and he should have prayed, 'Hashem - help Esav to do Teshuvah, so I can marry Dinah to him!' Dinah had the Midah of Leah (refer to 34:1:1:1), and also she was a proper Zivug for Esav (refer to 29:25:151:4).
Oznayim la'Torah: Whereas a man is obligated to try to bring his brother to do Teshuvah, a woman is under no such obligation to risk her own spiritual wellbeing in order to help a cousin to do Teshuvah.
See also Sifsei Chachamim.
Even though Esav said so only later, Yaakov could have opened the box and suggested the match then. Is Yaakov wrong to be concerned lest Esav is not sincere, or that his Teshuvah will not last? We find that old Resha'im, when they realized the truth, truly repented, e.g. Nevuzaradan (Gitin 57b) and Yosef Meshisa (Bereishis Rabah 65:22). Perhaps Yaakov sensed that if Esav saw Dinah, he would divorce his evil wives, marry her and truly repent! (PF)
Rashi writes: "Yabok - The name of the river." What is Rashi clarifying?
Gur Aryeh: Yabok is not the name of a city, but rather the name of a river, as we learn from Devarim 3:16.
