When explaining the Mishna in Mes. Nazir on daf 8a, in answer #1)(b) you say: "When someone says 'Hareini Nazir Melo ha'Bayis O Melo ha'Kupa' - we ask him what he meant."
We've just spent many weeks "struggling" with Meseches Nedarim trying to decide what a person might mean when he says certain words or phrases. Asking him what he meant seems like a very good "Eitza". Why didn't we use this good advice in each case of doubt previously when we were trying to decide what the Noder meant when he said what he said?
Jeff Ram
This question arises repeatedly, most recently on Daf 2b, where the Gemara concludes that although the Noder says that it was his intention to accept Nezirus, we must also have a Nazir walking by in order to assess his intent.
Although there are many facets to this question, the general rule is as follows. There are two basic categories of Nedarim with regard to this question, and there is an integral difference between them.
1. If the language used (Lashon ha'Neder) is so vague that it cannot be understood, asking the Noder does not help. A Neder must be expressed in words , and if the wording is ambiguous it has not been expressed in words, even if he says that he intended to make a Neder.
2. The second category is where although the wording of the Neder is properly phrased, there remain alternate possibilities as to what the Noder meant (e.g. when the ambiguity is being caused because the word has two meanings, and therefore there is a possibility that he does not mean to make a Neder). In such a case, the person making the Neder may explain whether or not he intended for a Neder to be made, since the wording was proper (even though his wording could have been explained a few different ways).
Dov Zupnik