Hello:
Where does one find the halacha as to the need to stay as far away as possible from the ex-wife and to have no contact with her unless absolutely necessary?
Devorah Rozenblum, Denver, Colorado, USA
Dear Ms. Rozenblum,
The Halachah you are looking for is in the Shulchan Aruch (Even haEizer 119:7-8). The Shulchan Aruch is based on the Psak of the Rambam (Hilchos Isurei Bi'ah 21:27). The Rambam in turn is based on a Beraisa in Kesuvos (27b going over to 28a)
The Halachah only says that the divorced couple should not live in the same courtyard. It doesn't say that they need to live as far away as possible. In fact, according to some Poskim (Chelkas Mechokek) they can live in the same courtyard as long as they are careful to not seclude themselves together (Yichud)(this is only true if the woman hasn't remarried. If she has remarried the Halachah is more stringent).
Kol Tuv,
Yonasan Sigler
This is not a Psak Halachah