The Gemara on 65a discusses the blessing of having sons as compared to having daughters. Is this issue expounded elsewhere? Can you give some insight into how commentaries deal with this?
frank, New York, New York
Below is a previous discussion list question from Kiddushin 82.
I heard in our Shiur that it could mean, "Don't make your sons like daughters," by not practicing the Mizvos designated for a son which a daughter is exempt of doing.
See Meiri there, who suggests a similar interpretation.
["...an additional interpretation of this Gemara is, woe to the person whose sons are lacking and not fulfilling their role, happy is he whose sons are filling the role they are supposed to."]
I heard a pshat that the term "son" or "zachar" in the Gemorroh should be understood as a mashpia and the term "daughter" or "nekeivah" is a mekabel, because of their respective natural roles in the mitzvah of pirya verivya.
Thus, what the Gemorroh is teaching us is that fortunate is the one whose children are mashpiyim, or leaders and woe is the one whose children are merely mekablim, or followers. The army, for example, needs both generals and soldiers. Fortunate is the one whose children are generals.
This pshat also explains the second half of the quote which says "woe is the one whose SONS (bonov) are nekeivos." Since we are talking about nekeivos, it should logically say "woe is the one whose daughters (bnosov) are nekeivos. According to the foregoing pshat, the Gemorroh is not talking about males and females, but rather leaders and followers.
Thank you, David. Yes, that seems to be more or less the way that the Me'iri which we cited interprets the Gemara.
Be well,
M. Kornfeld
The Gemara in Sanhedrin 100b suggests that the reason why it is forbidden to read Sefer Ben Sira is because it says in it the following:
"A daughter is a false treasure for her father. For worry about her he will not sleep at night. In her childhood, lest she be seduced. In her youth, lest she be promiscuous. When she becomes of age, lest she not find a husband. If she gets married, lest she not have children. In her old age,lest she practice witch-craft."
The Gemara rejects this option because we find that Chazal say the same thing in the Mishna in Kiddushin 82b (the one quoted in our Gemara in Pesachim 65) "Happy is the one whose children are male, woe to the one whose children are female." We see that the Gemara understood the Mishnah to mean the same as the verse in Ben Sira quoted above.
It appears that the natural inclination is to worry more about ones daughters than about ones sons. Perhaps because generally they tend to be more vulnerable a person is more susceptible to worrying about them.
It is also interesting to note that Rav Chisda said that he prefered daughters over sons (Bava Basra 141a see Rashbam and Tosfos there).
Dov Freedman